So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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