Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
