he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
