I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize