so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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