dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
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