I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Randomize
