So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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