girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I am midnight drunk by noon
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
