Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
