how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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