:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
