we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
