In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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