Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
