i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Life is so much better after having sex.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
