No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
