Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
