So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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