We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
