how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
