Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize