i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
