shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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