I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
