You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
