I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
