I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
