What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
