The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
