just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
