dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
