Small penises have feelings too.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
