I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
