Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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