Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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