Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I can't turn off my feet"
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize