At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
she smelled like a LAN party
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize