Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
