Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize