I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize