im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
