We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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