there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize