The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
The uberlube is also flammable
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
My vagina is officially offended.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize