i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
