Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
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