i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
