I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
