ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
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