my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize