why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
